(2003)
Reviewed By-Paul Cooke
Director : Brian Clement Scripted : Brian Clement Starring : Masahiro Oyake , Claire Westby , Hiroaki Itaya , Moira Thomas , Chelsey Arentsen , Chuck Depape , Chantelle Adamache , Denys Melanson & Rob Nesbitt(2003)
Reviewed By-Paul Cooke
Director : Brian Clement Scripted : Brian Clement Starring : Masahiro Oyake , Claire Westby , Hiroaki Itaya , Moira Thomas , Chelsey Arentsen , Chuck Depape , Chantelle Adamache , Denys Melanson & Rob NesbittFrom Independent film Director Brian Clement comes a refreshing shot directly into the decaying artery of the Living Dead movie. Infusing life after death into a lacklustre genre that’s been about as exciting as Pee Wee Herman self resurrecting in a one man handed multiplex. A collage of horror coolness that redefines Indie film making for the multi generational Horror flick hunger hounds , whether weaned on old school schlock or rabid puppies looking for that ‘B’ movie boner. This thrice told tale of the Necronomicon feeds the anarchic threshold of an Arian mindset , as possession of the book transcends the very passage of time itself from a feudal past to war ravaged future. Japanese language with beautifully rendered English subtitles dropped outside of the wide screen frame , down in that black bar where they sit best , begins the first part of this highly enjoyable Anthology of coffin dodgers ‘The Forest Of Death’. A lone Samurai seeks passage through a fearsome forest. Met at the fringe of the invidious cornucopia by a monk , he is guided along a quicker but far more dangerous route. A place where the Dead rise up to attack the living !. The Samurai is searching for his brother who journeyed the same pathway but never made it to his destination. Both men ordained by their master to seek out an iniquitous artefact , hidden deep within the forest of fear , infused with the power to raise up the very deceased. The Japanese lord and master maniacally obsessed in creating an unstoppable army of the living dead.The monk is the very antithesis to such dark arts and by his own calling cannot allow the Tome to be uncovered. Samurai and monk must put aside their personal conflict of interest as the dead appear to confront them both. Dribble to the saliva Tory delights of mixing it up with ‘The Evil Dead’ road tripping with ‘Versus’ for the Grooviest slice and splice segment this side of a spurting Satsuma blood orange. Night falls and the very well lit scene disco dances to the tune of death as sword meets festering flesh , all to the accompaniment of Zatochi esque blood spurting siphon sprays. Woo Haw hit the ceiling fan appreciation overload comes in the excellent body slicing moment , gloriously excelling with a delayed blood gushing fountain to finish. It’s a battle against the un-dead hordes as the lure of the artefact brings about the madness in man.
Don’t flip your remote or turn a somersault frenzy as your viewing apparatus turns a monochrome shade , be assured you have not stepped into ‘The Twilight Zone’ or had the horizontal hold taken over by ‘The Outer Limits’ !. It’s time to settle back into the episodic show reel from a bygone age of Old School Black and White Fifties styled picture with ‘Shadow Of Tomorrow’. Shot in glorious Full Screen A Vision with opening title credits that wondrously play upon your tube in gleaming white lettering , blazoned with a 3D depth that leaps out into your living room like a set of pearly teeth chomping for your attention. An endemic graveyard backdrops the night scene bringing memories of late night television viewing from a youth gone by , anticipating the arrival into shot of Tor Johnson and Bela Lugosi. Marvel at the monochrome machinations as the world of undercover detecting and an insidious plot to rule the world unravel like a twine of wool , pawed at by an estranged cat sanctioned from ‘Pet Sematary’. Mickey Spillane does Universal Horror as a female Mike Hammer meets ‘The Bride Of Frankenstein’. Replete with a well cast eccentric Elsa Lancaster type golden age fading starlet , not far removed from a reclusive Joan Crawford. The heroine here is a post war pixie Fifties styled variation on V.I Warshawski , existing in the world of Film Noir and a walking pin up for pre pubescent palm players. This foxy Miss is in the Grave business of private detecting , where seeking out a missing person leads her to far more than a Dead end !. Three times is the charmer as a Post Apocalyptic future landscapes the ‘Last Rumble’. Rubble in the once stone jungle as motorcycle riding London styled ‘Mods’ rev into town , resplendent with faux hooded parkers and an evolved denture set of Vampiric fangs !. Lording the once burgeoning Metropolis like anachronistic vagrants , once removed from ‘The Bronx Warriors’. Even two wheeled toothy terrors have a nemesis and this gang of garlic averters clashes with their rival biker clan clique. The ‘Rockers’ are the new world order of Werewolves , low on facial hair but big on canine attitude. The inner beasts are soon set free like a carnivore freak sideshow.
The real monster of this world remains mankind with the government militia hunting down and rounding up both Vampire and Werewolf race for experimentation , and as unwitting entrants into ‘The Pit’ for a vicious fight of survival. Heads are crushed and brains spilt with an overlooking crowd baying for the buzz of a chainsaw , wielded for extra slice and ruby red splice. Entrants battle for their very lives with failed human experiments that refuse to remain dead. As combatants soon realise , it takes plenty of guts to survive this Pit. There are many inspired Gore moments on display here amidst the age old bond of friendship beyond the boundaries of creed , colour and religion. A female Vampire and Werewolf pool together in adversity as rampant heroines fuelled by a bloodlust to stay alive , like Thelma and Louise with PMS. There’s even a lesbian love making moment that’ll make the pulse pound way south of the wrist as their beast is unleashed. Having chased the cherry these two sexual hybrids are refreshed and infused with a killer instinct , coming together once more as they fight for freedom. The onslaught is one of unbridled vengeance as hapless guards get their heads crushed and faces literally torn off , all to gloriously bloody effect splashed upon those crisp white garbed body suits. These gas mask wearing minions don’t get a chance to smell the roses before they’re pushing up the daises by the dozen. Strong undertones of a Nazi regime exude from the porous veneer of this concentration holding. The presence of an Arian race reminds its audience just how far un-removed a future society may still be from the brink of despotic dictatorship. Evil is ever present even in a paradoxical world !.The seamless prologue intrinsically links the three tales , as the power of the Necronomicon is realised and time displacement unravels the unearthly connection between the episodic players. Curtain call should follow with rapturous applause from the watching audience , uniformly nodding with that clandestine smile of ‘B’ movie goodness appreciation. If ‘Plan 9 From Outer Space’ were remade as Oscar winning material ‘Exhumed’ would be it’s main contender.
Dedicated To Mr. Brian Clement
Presentation : Wide Screen Ratio Aprox 1:66:1 / Full Screen Segment Release : Frontline Films Coding : NTSC Sound : Stereo 2.0 Extras : Behind The Scenes / Outtakes / Trailers / Photo Gallery
Behind the scenes photographs reproduced with the kind permission of Brian Clement. The UNRATED DVD for Exhumed may be purchased on line direct from Frontline Films: www.frontlinefilms.net Tell them Cinema Nocturna sent you.
Film: 4.0 BITCH SLAPS Picture: 4.0 BITCH SLAPS Sound: 4.0 BITCH SLAPS Extras: 3.0 BITCH SLAPS Overall: 4.0 BITCH SLAPS